Sunday, September 24, 2006

Whisper of a Dead Soul

The night
The moon
And you…

You…
Walking slowly…
Empty mind,

Alone…

So near
Yet
So far…

Don’t cry…
Stay here
To see
Worlds’ cry!!!

Crying……
Can they???
It’s death…

Itz dark,
Itz black,
Blackhole?

Itz life
Living death…
Hell?
Or just,
Not heaven…

Come here
Sit once…
Can you?

Tell me
Can you?
Only you?

I wish…
You can,
You wish
You can…
Time wishes
You can’t

Cold night…
Cold touch…
Your touch…
So cold!!!

Dreams…
Broken…

My graveyard…
White flowers…
Tears…

But you
Come here
Feel me…

Can you???

Blue night…
Winds blow…
Dry leaves…

It’s me…

Stretch
Your hands…
And…
Listen…

It says…
Something…

Listen…

It says...

My heart
Still beats…

For love…
For life…
For you…

Friday, September 22, 2006

The Nature's Rhythm...

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Rhythm is a fundamental property of motion. You may sometimes refer to it as Periodicity and sometimes as Music! But overall it is the same... it is anything that repeats itself and has a particular personality of its own.

Yes, Personality is the word. This may sound weird, but it is this intricate difference that makes one rythm different from the other. Take as an example, the rhythm of the waves crashing onto the sea beaches.

For the one who has been staying for a while at the beach, it becomes as close to his heart and mind as the rhythm of his own heart and breath. There's a little gap of anticipation when gradually the water collects itself, then forms a huge hillock and then with a loud impulsive, yet extensive crash it smears the golden beaches with gurgling white water... just like warm milk spilled over a toasted bread... it engulfs the bread to such an extent that for a moment the milk and the bread become One.

The waters of the sea engulfs the vicinity with such a force that it's lust for the land becomes so evident, the unbreakable relation between them is stamped with authority in this action. But when the water recedes, there's another sound... like a sublime cry... an intense passion of pain of two lovers growing apart, both of them unable to unclasp their hands and in that effort they end up tearing them apart... tearing up their souls for the cause.

Can you hear it, can you feel it... are you not getting drenched in their tears, are you not blown away by their sighs which you always feel at the beaches... well, I can. My ears are still filled up by this dual music of the sea, a part of the Nature's Rhythm.

Another instance is that of the Rain.

The Rain's difference in the rhythm lies in its frequency. Wait, dont think its haphazard... on the otherhand Rain is not a simple guy... he has a multi-dimensional personality! So much so that there are hidden layers of music in its so called fast-paced rhythm.

Rain unfolds itself to you depending upon you mindset. It's like a friend who soothes you no matter how you feel. His voice seems fiiling your heart with joy, all the things it touches makes a sound of applausal, of celebration when you're happy. It seems like the whole town is dancing with you while the jostling and merry host is the rain itself. He arranges a surprise party for you, the most enjoyable and self-less one...

And, while you're in a doleful mode, the rain not only lends you a shoulder to cry into, but like an understanding friend hides your wails from the public with the sound of its consolation. And even, if you let the rain touch you then, it will wipe off the tears from your tender cheeks with the tears of its own! I wonder who else in this whole wide world will be such a friend who serves you expecting nothing for himself. Atleast to me, the Rain has been giving the greatest emotional support over the ages...

The Nature's Rhythm is intense. But you only need to have the ears to listen to it.

~~--------------~~

This was originally not meant to be written as a post. I was just writing a lazy email to one of my friends. But I thought, "Whoa! Long time I haven't posted anything in SFTH!" So I gave in again to my laziness and just copy-pasted it from that email. So guyz, please dont mind if this is kinda cheap in the garland of the beautiful flowers of posts that you've been quite successfully composing...

Thursday, September 21, 2006

10 RULES FOR A BLESSED DAY

1. TODAY I WILL NOT STRIKE BACK . . .
If someone is rude, if someone is impatient, if someone is unkind, I
will not respond in a like manner.

2. TODAY I WILL ASK GOD TO BLESS MY 'ENEMY'
If I come across someone who treats me harshly or unfairly, I will
quietly ask God to bless that individual. I understand "enemy" could be
a family member, neighbor, co-worker or stranger.

3. TODAY I WILL BE CAREFUL ABOUT WHAT I SAY . . .
I will carefully choose and guard my words being certain that I do not
spread gossip.

4. TODAY I WILL GO THE EXTRA MILE . . .
I will find ways to help share the burden of another person.

5. TODAY I WILL FORGIVE . . .
I will forgive any hurts or injuries that come my way.

6. TODAY I WILL DO SOMETHING KIND FOR SOMEONE, (BUT I WILL DO IT IN
SECRET . . . )
I will reach out anonymously and bless the life of another.

7. TODAY I WILL TREAT OTHERS THE WAY I WISH TO BE TREATED . . .
I will practice the golden rule. "Do Unto others as I would have them do
unto me"- with EVERYONE I encounter.

8. TODAY I WILL RAISE THE SPIRITS OF SOMEONE WHO IS DISCOURAGED . . .
My smile, my words, my expression of support, can make the difference to
someone who is wrestling with life.

9. TODAY I WILL NURTURE MY BODY . . .
I will eat less . . . I will eat only healthy foods. I will thank God
for my body.

10. TODAY I WILL GROW SPIRITUALLY . . .
I will spend a little more time in prayer today. I will begin reading
something spiritual or inspirational; I will find a quiet place (at some
point during this day) and listen to God's voice.

Luke 10:27
He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all
your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love
your neighbor as yourself.'"

Luke 10:27
We learn three principles about loving our neighbor: (1) lack of love is
often easy to justify, even though it is never right; (2) our neighbor
is anyone of any race, creed, or social background who is in need; and
(3) love means acting to meet the person's needs.
Wherever you live, there are needy people close by. There is no good
reason for refusing to help.

Remember, today is a gift from God so treat it preciously

( I was surfing net...suddenly saw this article.....thought to share this in sfth)

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Add + to ur life

Positive thinking can help one very much. How? Let me explain. On the day of an examination(for e.g maths) the students are generally tensed very much. They think," oh! what would happen if i cannot answer a single question or i forget all tht i have learnt and practised! oh !!!!" well this is the way atleast my friends think beofre our maths exam. You can see how they think negative. they lose all confidence and count themselves as the worst of all. while giving the exam when they see a little tough question they get soo much frightened tht they go wrong even with the easy sums. they forget tht they have some brains too with the help of which they can ezily answer the question in the question paper. thus u see how they fail to achieve success.
The same happens in real life too. Most of us think tht we dont have any talent so we wont be able to do anything good or successful. We underestimate our abilities. We forget that Nature has given all of us the legs hands five senses and the power to think. even then only few of us are successful in our lives and are remembered for hundreds of years. Why? What's the mystery of their success? Noone is born wise, wisdom is made. then why only THEY have happiness, laughter in their lives?
one day i was reading a book of Shiv Khera and on the cover of book it was wriiten--
" Winners dont do different things, they do things differently."
This rang a bell in my head and i realized tht THIS IS THE ANSWER!!! Yes the successful see the lives in a different way. Thts why they are successful. Thts why they are different from the rest. THEY HAVE A POSITIVE ATTITUDE TOWARDS LIFE. they think they can be succesful and so they are. Our fault is tht we never think tht its us who are building our future not some unseen hands. WE are the one who choose how we would live. if we think tht i will be sad and wont be ever successful then the thoughts will prove to be true. but if we say tht YES I CAN then there is noone in this whole universe to stop us from being the WINNERS. once when we do make a mistake we think tht "see i cant do it. this is not for me. i cant do anything in life coz i have failed once and i fear tht i wont be successful again. " Hah! We are soo stupid!! Learn from ur mistakes and just go ahead. have the courage to face challenges. Dont lose the game before it even starts. Just keep one thing in mind ----

I WILL DO IT BECAUSE I CAN!

Friday, September 15, 2006

TO LOVE : the journey continues...

Section 6. My Last Letter to Mayaa...

Projecting love wrongly.
A delinquency done.
I never knew how to love.
The Blue of the depth, we thought our love had
And the Green of longeveity,
Mayaa,
Are fast losing their colours...
And the moonbeam now wavers
Only as a figment of my naive imagination.
"What might be a joke for you might be an object of utmost seriousness..."
My heavy eyes
Drop a few silent tears on your breasts..
My tired head resting on your bosom;
..My heart dissected
With the scissors of logical categorisations..

Can you hear me, Mayaa? ..Tell me. ..Where do I go now?

Love was always a joke to us, wasn't it Mayaa?
We laughed together. We cried together. We rested in each others' cool shadows when Time halted for a few moments, in its fast journey, by mistake..


This series was not an insult towards Love. It was just a trial to crack down the devil scientifically.
May be, there are two ways to view this world. Emotionally and scientifically. With your warm heart. With your analizing mind.

The Heart tends to integrate. The Mind wants to disintegrate.

A photographer knows that when the angle of a shot is changed, it doesn't change the object itself...

And it's not that the person who cares to take a picture from an odd angle doesn't know how to take it straight...

Love.
Was always a joke to me, yes!
A Black Humour.
..Which has always taught me....

that, ..it's all a matter of coming and going in this world, and attaching so much unnecessary importance to the days in between.

We are all going to perish one day. Why try to 'explain' an 'emotion' then? And what harm is to try and 'explain' an 'emotion' then? Everything is so impermanent. And hence, so insignificant.

Impermanent are we.
And hence, imperfect.
The Orange morning sky makes to us a promise. Onto which we cling so dearly.
Till,
The imperfect soil
Makes us understand
That it's just another of a stupid life
We look to live...

What is love other than a few hormonal secretions? What else is the heart other than a stupid, monotonous machine that continues to pump blood in and out of our lives, without any valid reasons...

Love rendered insignificant? In our hearts, does the quest ever end?

And it's just this 'practical' part that I had tried to break and peep into...
Just may be to find, that can a scientific explanation help us reduce the infinite pain we get? ..May be, just on a trial to find some answers that the heart itself has always cared us not to give.

You know, the minds had always tried to insult. And more so when it's an emotion under their scanner. Only a few experiments it observes and draws a few conclusions -- which are never right!

Science is never right.
It only models.
And modelling is, perhaps, the only way to simplify..

And there are always new, subsequent theories coming up to 'explain' wherever the previous ones go inadequate.
Quantum mechanics came like that. Einstein's 'velocity correction' of Newton was nothing but that.
Century old theories, ..Classical mechanics, Newton's laws -- thought to be correct!

"The centre of my own Universe
Am I,
Creating enchanting dreamworlds..."
"To broaden my horizon
And to take others' views in...?"

Yes. That's how Images are transformed to Reality. The Magic Realism originating from our fallibility expands to form the Ultimate Vision...

But how could such heavenly light be created, if other fellow modellers do not join in?

Many will fail. I failed. And now I know "at least one way in which I cannot make a bulb."

And someday, someway
Wouldn't an Edison care to come up to mend my broken bulb?
Would ever Love's Logic and Emotion be confluenced to take the flow path of Philosophy?
Why not start now...? Why not let us try...? ..Because each one of us holds some unrevealed stories to tell.

"Can you tell what another person is thinking? You can only assume."
: ) : ) It's only this that quantifications are always tried to be made universal.

But I forget that I had ended up with a broken bulb!

I forget that even in today's world, poets refuse to be scientists! ..Even for just a while!

May be, it's too much of a wastage of energy that I had asked from them, Mayaa...

If only repititive art-pieces could save our Love... and on 'practical' grounds...!

And all this while, what I will be left with is a few shattered pieces of my brainchild, that will always care to remind me that I didn't know how to love...

If you only could forgive me, Mayaa..!

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Dream of a Girl

Don’t come to me

Don’t look at me…

Why do you?

Am I going insane?

When the moon

Give rays

On earth,

On my memory lane…

The touch

I treasure…

Do I really?

Or it’s just pleasure?

Sometimes… sometimes… sometimes… we can’t control… or may be, we don’t want to control!!! Our brain and our heart both indulge in a war… a war of to be or not to be… but still everything happens… because it happens… because it is destined to happen…

The deep blue night

Two souls became one

Or, two half souls?

Is it true that when two persons love each other (as lover) they become one soul? But, the devilish truth behind this word is when two souls become one then the result is two half souls… pardon me… correct me… if you find it wrong…

Differences erased

By our brains…

And,

Our brains united…

Our souls didn’t.

I cried…

But

Then I couldn’t…

Lips locked

I’m locked inside you

My soul didn’t lock…

But your soul was screaming

“PLEASE DON’T GO!”

I sacrificed…

Everything I possess

“You are insane”

My heart says-

To my brain…

Prince Charming, Romeo, and loads…

A girl grow up… with a dream, that one day her Prince Charming will come riding a horse to take her with him…

The girl grows up… becomes a lady… a women… becomes successful… professionally very successful… but the dream is still young… as it was the 1st day.. When she read “mills and boons”… or “love story” first time…

But … but… but…

One day she saw her dreams are smashed… she saw that her dreams are smashed… and she is sleeping with a man… a successful man… a loving boyfriend… partner… or husband… but not his Prince Charming!!!

The Slap of Reality!!!


(I apologize to everyone for this weird post... actually last night suddenly this post comes to my mind from some thing...please bother this post..or don't bother...)

Monday, September 11, 2006

.

The music was divine
The moment was spootless
But where were you ?
For heavens , give a twinkle
The heavy sound
Sounded sweet
I knew you would not say ..
Sweet sensations are between us
Why did it rain ?
Why did I cry ?
I could not answer you back
I could not measure life
A spotless mind looks good
But where is the beauty of rubbish
Mistakes always happen
We are all human
I love the rhythm in your smiles
They haunt me so often
You wait for sunshine
I weep for the sunset
If it was a game
why did we play it ?
No answers
Silence haunts me
You knew I was lost
you never cared to show me the way
A selfish soul never waited for you all this days
I am wide awake in my sleep
I am searching to memories to delete
I haven't slept for a while
Wide open are the doors
refusal to look inside
Do not speak
Do not spoil the divine moment
Can I kill you ?
Like all conspiring lovers !
I will , in due time
Like a dreaded dream
I run back to you
addiction to a smile of yours hurts me a lot
Broken glasses I said could not be repaired
But I melted them and re casted them
What next ?
I answer my questions
Why don't you answers your own tragedies

Closed chapter with misplaced pages
Progress is stalled in a quite corner
Blind sarcasms are no longer funny
Call me back to the attic
Push me down
I am fragile
I am bound to break in the impact
But I shall return with an answer
If you ask a question !

Saturday, September 09, 2006

TO LOVE : the journey of the human psyche from the Orange of Dreams to the Brown of Soil

Successful love stories do not need psyching-outs. It's only when a love fails that you ask yourself questions.
And again, some loves fail due to misfortunes; ..due to incidents that couldn't be avoided; ..due to fate.
Leave them. They have different stories to tell.
But there are some loves which fail due to separations.
No fate this time. No third angle issues. It's just that the relationship itself failed. And it's then when you want to know more, ...that exactly what went wrong.
In Section 2, I promised to try and give an answer to the question that why our feelings do not get reciprocated when we love somebody so passionately, in many of the cases. Or why somebody lets us know, at the middle of a relationship, that he/she is not interested anymore.
And in the forthcoming section I am going to do exactly that.
To try. To try and categorise.
Categorisations in Love come when you stop using your heart. Don't ask me if it's right to do that. I am going to do exactly that. I told you this is more like a Reseach Paper on Love. Not a poem.
It's time we dissected love with our Brains, so that we don't have to go through the same pain once all over again. More so perhaps because you don't want to repeat your mistakes the second time, ..if Love ever comes to you the second time.
You can't guarantee that it will not. More so in today's world, where people have started to live at The Present.



Section 4. ...on Reciprocation of Love.
...on a search for the 'why's and 'how's.


You think you love. And the truth is you do. Passionately, sincerely... you care. And when you see your love is not getting reciprocated, you start to feel the pain. And you love more. In your mind. In your heart. And you get more pain.
(Will you come out? It's the test of your love. We will look for the 'how's and 'why's of this question later!)

Why does this happen?

Because the strength of your feelings, your carings, ..the strength of your love, .. never quite manages to reach the person. It's misdirected.

Everyone of us in this world is unique in our own way. And we love in our own ways. And very naturally, we want to receive love in the way we want to. And, ..may be it's here, ..where we go wrong.

We not only need to respect the differences that we lovers have, we also need to identify the differences. It's more tough compared to what it looks at the first glance. It's here where understanding comes in.

If we understand each other, inspite of our differences, we connect. We can see and identify when we receive love. Even if that way of love doesn't conform to our own way of loving...

It's then when you do understand, your loving energy gets a direction. And may be, the right one.

Or else, ...this fact is too true that when one does start to receive unconditional love, he/she just can't resist a desire to connect. As the bottomline of this world is: Every heart is lonely. Each wants to live with a heart that understands it and cares for it.

You give love doesn't necessarily imply that your partner receives that love.
You can only manage to bridge the gap, and mitigate the energy loss, by Understanding, ..by Connecting.

But again, what happens if the differences --which never show up first, at the start of a relationship; ..and gradually start to emerge out of nowhere.. -- are too big to live with?

You have three options then.

1. You change your lover.
2. You change yourself.
3. You part ways.

When there's a strong love between two persons, with a minimal understanding of each other, ..both of them change themselves fitting the requirements of their Love. Slowly they change. But surely.

This is called 'adaptation to the other's needs' in Love's language.

And this continues untill you conform to the same things, or at least, stop disapproving the other's habits and ways of living and ways of loving and receiving love.

It's perhaps wrong to force a change in your lover. And you just can't force it if you love strongly. You hope that things are going to work out by their own. And then it may so happen that the person who claims to love you just don't bring in those changes. Or maybe, ..he/she just can't.
Or even it may so happen that you do these things yourself.

..so many things that can happen in Love.

And it's then when you start to think whether you should 'accept' or 'come out'!



Tough question. And the answer varies from person to person.

Many couples 'accept' each others' unchangable and painful differences and move on in life! For the concern they share for each other. For the sake of their Love.

And some are too individualistic to accept these differences. They part ways. Even if it hurts and hurts hell..

It's not that they are wrong. It's just that they are different.

Everybody should be given the liberty to walk his/her own way in life. As far as they don't break the laws or social morals or ethics.
It's the life of the two of them. Why not let them decide?

Or is it the case that you fell in love, ..without a minimal understanding of yourself and your partner? ...or, with a minimal understanding of the bond you shared before the commitment started?

You might say that you didn't plan and fall in love. Hmmm. True maybe. Yes, love happens. But then again, you had a minimum basis...

You don't fall in love with a person whose ways of life and whose points of view you strictly disagree with! Was your love Orange then? Nothing wrong in that. It's only that you have more risks. ..Risks of an unsecure or uncertain future together!

But do you claim that your love was a Brown one? ..All about accepting each others' unchangable differences and moving on in life? What went wrong, then?



Section 5. ...do you see the images right?
...it's the Game of Magic Realism.

LOVE IS BLIND.


To answer such questions, we should be going deeper into human psyche;
..where 'crush'es come in; ..the concepts of 'infatuations'...

More deep...

When your lover, --that person, projects an image showing who he/she pretends to be, ...that has a heaven and a hell difference with who he/she actually is.
You don't get a chance to know him/her better untill you come too close to identify the truth.

Even more deep...

When you hold conflicting desires at the depth of your own psyche, ..or different desires compared to what you believed to have.
It's the same thing. Just the other way round.
In the process you identify yourself, feel sorry and want to come out; ..but never admit that you did something wrong!
Oh! The satire to be a human!

Or, still deeper...

When you fall in love expecting so much from each other that you just fail to bear each others' loads at the middle of the relationship!

Or, someday, someway you discover that the understanding you shared at the beginning has vanished somehow. ..You had changed!
There stands a wall. Which neither of you can cross.
Nurturing your hurt egos, you part ways.

These things happen. It's called the Rocky Road of Love.

Some cross it together. Some leave behind their partners. Some are left behind.
And some leave behind themselves.

Unfortunate.
And this is just the price you pay, if you fall in love with a person whose varying images you can't grasp or manipulate...

Be sure where you are going out. And with whom.

If possible, restrict your feelings inside.
Be patient and observe. Yes, it's tough to do, ..if not impossible, ...when you are in love.

But let your Heart love and give this job to your Brain, ..can you? Let it see and weigh the pros and cons of a satisfying and secure future.

Let it decode the images. Are they real ? Are you in love with an image, --somebody you just believe to exist, ..or ...do you really connect ? How much Orange does your Brown have?

Play the game efficiently to strip the images off. Let your Brain reveal the Real person whom your Heart claims to love...

You can at least Try, ..than to feel sorry for yourself the second time...


( I will try my best to end this gibberish in another post...)

Broken blossoms:

Zareena is 12.She cannot help but excitedly narrate to others what fun school is. Words, numbers, colours, friends….she enjoys every bit. Zareena’s life was very different even a few months back. A flashback into her life will tell a story….a story that is still a reality for many more Zareena’s …..

She is the elder daughter of a poverty-stricken four member family of Sivakasi, a matchstick making village in Tamil Nadu. Inability of her factory working father and domestic help mother to make both ends meet, naturally pushed the seven year old into work. But Zareena wasn’t alone. All children of her village were employed at the matchstick factory. The day started at 4.30 AM when a bus from the factory arrived to pick up the children and take them to the factory. Here Zareena began work by placing frames for the matchsticks into racks. Following a breakfast of fermented rice and pickle, she filled boxes, labeled them and helped packing them. After a few days at the factory, little Zareena was engaged in mixing chemicals in the factory’s boiler room. The first signs of the seven year old’s health breaking down became evident. She often came home with scalded fingers and hands. Sitting for long hours in that cramped position left her shoulders. Because of incessant inhaling of hot and toxic chemicals, the girl developed respiration trouble. After almost 12 hours at work, Zareena returned home with the rest. Here too the same meagre meal welcomed her home. She had no books, colours, pictures, toys. A little sleep was all she asked for....the balm to heal her wounds and prepare her for the hard day to follow. But even that was interrupted by the screams and squeals of her mother, being bashed by his drunk father, just home from work. Tears rolled down the little girl’s eyes, wetting the pillow beneath her head.

Zareena wanted to study. Whenever she accompanied her ammi to the household where she worked, which wasn’t too often, she was awestruck. There was a complete children’s room, where the kids spoke in a language strangely foreign to her. They laughed at her when she couldn’t respond to their questions, mocked at her for not going to school……..more tears..who would listen to Zareena’s story? Ammi? She had her own tragedies to deal with…..Abba? He pulled at her plaits and beat her when anyone from the factory complained that she had dozed off for a few minutes during work.

It sunk into her system…..her life just went on and on……matchsticks, frames, fermented rice and pickle, labels, chemicals, heat, stains, burns…

Then ARUNODHAYA happened to her. True to its name, it brought into Zareena’s life, the rays of the sun. like her, many others from the village were given a new lease of life.

Education opened her eyes, and she convinced her parents that she positively wanted to attend school. Arunodhaya made sure that Zareena and the rest would not have to go back to the factory.

12 year old Zareena is the “student leader” of her class. English is her favourite subject. Clad in an old cheap salwaar kameez, she talks in a determined voice. Zareena aspires to be a doctor. She tries her best to cut down on abba’s drinking, and believes she’s doing good at it.

Zareena is one of god’s chosen children…..the right thing happened and the story of her life turned completely. But what about the rest like her? What about the lanky boy who works dangerously in the mechanic shop? What about the 6 year old, who has left her village, to come take care of your 6 month old? Will the innocent girl who works in the heat and chemicals of the glass bangle factory, ever be fortunate to adorn her wrists with beautiful bangles….

Friday, September 08, 2006

A Long Leave


Well I had been on a long leave these days coz I was battling with my Part I exams....and no I'm not heaving a sigh of relief now that it's over...coz I'm dreading the day when my results would be announced!


So what was I doing these days?Well I went to Belur math one fine evening to watch the "Sandhya Arti" and that too by a river boat ride on the Ganga.Man it was awesome!Now I really do believe once in a life time you should go there to watch the arti and that too by a boat....and feel the winds caressing your face and you will feel like an uncaged bird free from all wordly meaness and pettiness!And when you will hear the"Aratric bhajan" of the brahmacharies echoing and filling in the great hall of the Mandir...you will feel closer to God like never before!

It may be so that many of you may be thinking"whats so great about it?".......but believe me once you go there ...surely you will feel like I did!

I would have loved to write down the details...but words have failed me in this case,I guess.Till then..........

Sionara!

Thursday, September 07, 2006

The Fighter's Spirit

(There are some very fundamental mis-conceptions of the public about the Martial Arts. Being a proud martial artist myself, I always dreamt about writing something that creates a stir and clears all the fog about this wonderful form of art. I've finally took up the effort to put it into words briefly and I hope this doesn't go in vain...)

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Shakespeare said that Life is a stage where we play different characters tactfully. But more than that, I believe that life is an arena, a battle-field where we fight out each other’s existence, struggle to survive in this hostile place.

This is not only a war with each other individuals, this battle is not at all that simple… this war is against none other, but Ourselves! Yes, here we learn to fight out our intentions, we learn to control our desires, we learn to conquer the evil inside us. But, what is the target? To win in all of these battles, of course. But, the question is ‘Why?’ … Why should we fight with our natural instincts and desires that are rooted so deep inside us? The answer is: That is what makes us human. If we let ourselves go in any way that it wants to, literally, there wouldn’t be any difference between us and the barbaric wild animals. And, using our intuition we know very well, that it wont be a suitable environment to live in.

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Yes, at the end of the day we are still animals, but we have a special power that they actually lack… the power to Think, the power to Analyse, the power to Dream, the power to Hope, the power of intuition, … that is, the powers of the inner Spirit!

Here I’m not talking about ‘Divinity’. I am here to show you the magnanimity of the power of the Spirit inside all of us. The mainframe of our system, which gives instructions out to our body and mind, is controlled by none other than the Will power. Infact, actually there is nothing we do that we wish not to! Anything and everything we do or think is empowered and governed by this Will.

We realise it or not, there is a fighter in each and everyone of us. Yes, I am talking to YOU … there’s a fighter in YOU too! Though it remains very dominant and passive, it is very aggressive and ferocious; it finds every other opportunity to escape the four-walls of the dungeons of cowardice and come out through our actions.

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Martial Arts is publicly thought to be a sport or atleast a co-curricular activity that helps you to be physically strong and defend yourself from oppressers effectively. Apart from these, martial artists are thought to be ‘cool’ and ‘dangerous’. But now, I will tell you about the original philosophy, the actual meaning and goal behind the practice of the Martial Arts.

The origin of the martial arts, specifically the arts of Kungfu and Karate, was surprisingly from the most peace-loving communities of the human society, the Buddhist Monks. These people, who generally spend their whole day meditating, got biologically affected for remaining physically inactive for a time time. Hence several diseases and physical problems and sometimes sleep used to creep-in in the hours of self-realisation. Apart from that, there were many communities who loved to annoy these peaceful people. Hence, as a method of self-defence and also as an exercise, originated the martial arts.

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The object of martial arts is not fighting, on the contrary it is used to stop fighting. I remember, when I was a kid, I was very turbulent, impatient and sometimes very aggressive and violent. But now, after 8 years of extensive training in the martial arts, I can redirect all of my negative energy for a positive cause. I am now one of the most non-violent, peaceful , soft-spoken and patient people of my group. Martial arts has taught me to live with my back straight and at the same time lower my head to my superiors. Ego, anger, impatience have got a back-seat while my confidence and mental stability have got an enormous boost. Concentration, focus, ability of resistance against all odds, the spirit of taking on any challenge, the cool mind to handle any presure… these are all the ‘side-effects’ of this pure form of art. This not only guides to be a better person, but makes you one and brings fundamental positive changes to your character and even the way you think.

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Thus the point is not to struggle, but being such that you suit perfectly in the system, without even noticing it yourself. And, this arts prepares the back-stage for this performance only. The main object is not to rectify others, but to rectify yourself… realise who you are, what your true abilities are, to be a a good human being yourself.

Corruptions exist, as it always will. Thus we know about scarred people who forgot the original purpose of this lesson of life-time. Instead they think of it as a ‘course’ and boast of ‘completeing’ it. Let me tell you something, most of us think that a black-belt is the final step of mastering a style of martial arts… but here goes the truth: in Japanese black belt is called Shodan, where ‘sho’ means ‘the first step’. Thus where we think that it has ended, actually that is the beginning! And let me tell you, martial arts is never a course, it has no end. Like you cant stop building your character, like you cannot become ‘The Master’ in music or literature, there is also to stopping in martial arts. It becomes an intricate part of your life, infact it become Life itself for you when you are seriously involved. And, I’m telling this all from a first-person’s view!

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But there are still some people who love to show off, they tread in the shallow depths of the ‘glamour’ and ‘cool factor’ of this art, and hence at the end of the day wear it just like an ornament, as a sport. But the ones, who embrace it to their soul, realise that it isn’t just a physical activity, but it is a Way of Life. The way to be peaceful in life, to be a person with honour, dignity and lastly security. The ornament, the glamour the individual ability, the flexibility … all wears off with old age, as it must. But the character remains. That is the target of martial arts… to gain permanence, to get incorporated into the character itself, which never wears off till Death does it apart, maybe!

Thus, according to me, a true martial artist may not be a champion in a number of national and international tournaments, but he is a champion of himself. For, he has learnt to conquer his senses, control his desires, divert his subtlest energies for a greater, nobler cause. He always wins, not little ‘skirmishes’ on a ‘builit-up arena’, but greater battles that really matter, and he also wins the heart of all the people around with his good nature, with his Love. Yes, don’t be so surprised, martial arts teaches us to love.

It takes us on a tour through the maximum hardships, treads in the boundaries of our capabilities and extend them to let us realise the unnoticed whole new passive world of extraordinary capabilities in us and ultimately reaches the Divine Soul that is within all of us and governing all our activities.

It nurtures the fighters in us and makes them Emperors, reigning upon an empire, that is Within!

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The champions hold their head high in the air and say :

Come ye trials and challenges; come life’s big waves, for I am ready…”

(Grandmaster Mas Oyama)

Thus is the meaning of Martial Arts.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Monday, September 04, 2006

TO LOVE : the journey of the human psyche from the Orange of Dreams to the Brown of Soil

( a few things to say : I do not intend to attack anybody living or dead. It's just this that by "you" or "we" in this post, I mean everybody of us; ..and, yes, including myself. I am human. I remain flawed thus. And again. This is my personal view. And neither do I expect to thrust my view on my readers. And still I wonder why I receive so many comments, when I do nothing other than to talk rubbish. I am sorry! You just may have to bear me for another 3 posts. Forgive me. And 'Thank You' for the reason that you haven't kicked me out of this blog as yet...)


Section 3. ...do we 'Understand'?
...do we know to play 'the Other'?

...ON OURSELVES.

It's this cucoon of self-absorbment, that we talked about in my last section, which we had never believed to exist in the first place.

We dream. Maybe, ..a better way to put it, ..we expect. Of course! What's life without expectations? What's life without hope?

But again.. expectations should be realistic.

Now what does being real or practical mean? Does it mean to tie yourself down to a few social, moral values? Does this mean that your desires should all be smashed to pieces just because this stupid world doesn't validate them?

(Poets do exactly that. They don't wait for the validation. They just express. And in most of the cases the world comes round ...after a hundred years... to these uttered words! But again, we are discussing on us, ..the common people, ..not on poets. Remember? ..We are discussing the love of soil, ..not the love of dreams.)

We might take a bit of help from psychology. The topic on which we would be discussing in this section is termed : 'projecting your self on another person' in psychology. It's called : "taking the role of The Other". What the hell is this all about?

It's nothing but a scientific/ statistical interpretation of the underlying word in all relationships. CONNECTION.

When you suddenly realise that the desires you hold, deep inside your heart, just don't take into account the other human beings on this planet, ... you know, that you are being one-sided!
You can't take yourself to be a broad minded person.

You CAN say : "I have the liberty to live my life.."

But again, this means that you are a very poor connector.
You don't connect with people. It's as if the others' lives, ..their problems, their constraints mean so very less to you.

i.e. you don't ... or is it 'can't'?... judge a situation, nor do you validate a desire -- placing yourself to somebody else' position. i.e. in psychological language, you just don't know to take The Other's role...

And it's then when the game of your life becomes dangerous. You play with pain. You play with fire. You have so many desires to fulfill. But then again, the world doesn't run by the wish of your wand. You stay locked up. In your cucoon. Dreaming...

And when you start stepping out, you start feeling for others.

You start to see others' emotions, others' feelings, others' constraints -- as if they were all yours.. Yours very own. And it's then when you start to understand the 'why's...

You start to know the reasons...

Your eyes open to the ever-complicated mathematics by which this world runs. ( ..because this world is supposed to contain everybody; ..not only you.)

And it is then when you suddenly realise what a baby you had once been... wrapped up in the blankets of your very own sky, ..having their very own stars. And you ask why were your dreams invalidated by reality? ..by this world? Have you thought about this world? Why would it think about you?

It's then when you start to undergo a transformation. Your desires are moulded in the new plane. And, ..maybe, ..they are rendered more right; ...more realistic.

Tell me, had you ever tried to find out why your lover left you? ..or, why he or she fights with you all the times? Did you search for his/her problems -- thinking them to be your very own?

Nobody is bad at heart.

He/she must have had some worries.. May be some unsolvable constraints.. Maybe, he/she decided not to tell you that thinking that you would never understand... Just think what a brilliant image you have in the eyes of your lover then. Whose fault is it anyway? Entirely his/hers?

No. Most of you blamed them. More of you cursed them. And maybe, lesser of you just felt dejected and drained and walked out with a heavy heart. Why? Just because your very own desires remain unfulfilled? ..See? What had I meant by 'the cucoon of self-absorbment'?

..And what do you think, your behaviour and attitude led your lover to think?

And what more do you want when you know, that your lover commited the very same mistake. ..If you only could allow me to call this a 'mistake'?

It's the game of Images, honey, that we, humans, play all our lives.

We make images. We break images.
Images grow. Images change.

But again, Real Truth always manages to stay hidden untill and unless you have the guts and strength to view something from all possible angles. ..If only you knew to take The Other's role. Then, some views wouldn't have locked themselves from your eyes for ever.

A rear camera in a soccer ground picks up a hand-ball, which was totally 'invisible' to the ninety-nine other cameras spread across the ground!


It's said that on one's point of view the world gets interpreted. To see Beauty, one needs to have a pair of beauty-seeking eyes.

And to make your desires come true, you should be able to mould your self.
"It's not the spoon, Neo", "If you look closely, you'll find that it's your mind that bends!"


All Relationships in this world run on one word. "UNDERSTANDING".
--On how well one partner 'understands' the other.
--On how well one partner moulds/ adapts himself/ herself to the needs of The Other.
..and for a relationship to stay, this must be from both the sides.

I had told you once before that nobody is bad at heart.
We are all here to love.
We just need to know how...

Most of the times, we love. But the energy gets misdirected. We end up having a fight.

And this happens because we just don't 'Understand'.

And how do we understand?

By learning to step out of our self-absorption. By learning how to play 'The Other' in a relationship.
By lending a hand of support. By lending a hand of Love.

Listen. And see. Make your mind bend, rather than trying desparately to bend this whole world.

Come out of your false cucoon. And spread Love.

It's easy...

(to be continued)

Friday, September 01, 2006

TO LOVE : the journey of the human psyche from the Orange of Dreams to the Brown of Soil

Section 2. Hitting the Bull's Eye... it needs honesty to face the truth.

It's hard to avoid practicality. And it's hard to avoid this truth as well that there lies numerous Desires in our psyche which we ourselves don't acknowledge consiously. A dear friend of mine had once told me this that most of these desires, if revealed, can create high disbelieves. ..but they are there. Right there. And sometimes these desires don't go by Social Rules. And there in comes the question of holding Practical Desires. ..well, however beautiful it may be, the poem in the last section doesn't echo practicality.

Each of us dream of a fulfilling love. But almost none of us get it. Is this merely by chance.. or, is there a Paradox hiding somewhere?

Do We Get To The Question Of Questions? :

Answer yourself. Do you love to love, or do you love to receive love more?

Love starts to take shape when you start caring. When someone's smile becomes the source of your joy... when someone's pain becomes the source of your sorrow, ..when your soul starts to connect with somebody.

And who doesn't want to be loved? When there's no question asked on why you behave the way you do. When there's no request asking for a change in your attitude and individuality. When someone just happens to know the right ratio between when to care for you and when to set you free, to let you be who you are. ..when someone is always there to support you at the times of need. ..and when someone makes you feel and believe that you are not alone in this world.. you say someone has started to care for you, someone has started to love you.

And yes, it hurts, ..when we love dearly never to receive love in return. And naturally when we sit down and discuss, there pops up a question. Why does this happen? We would be looking to discuss that in my next posts. But for the time being, let's turn our attention to something, ..perhaps.., more deep.

Do we EXPECT to be loved in return when we love? ..at least do we hold such desires deep in our subconcious? ..and does this word get projected to our concious undergoing a transformation to 'HOPE'?

A question worth asking.

If the two -- loving and being loved remain forever separated in the depth of our psyche, ..tell me, why do we stop caring when we don't receive love? Though it doesn't happen all the times, most of the times this does happen. Are we lovers, then?

..not expecting godly images from our own selves, and agreeing collectively on the fact that being humans we remain very much fallible.., can we answer to our own consience something very honestly?

Aren't we DEALERS of human emotions, then?

And if all of us think in the same line, who's going to come and love us? Had we loved somebody in our own lives? ..Unconditionally? How do we expect unconditional love, then?

We claim we love. We write poems. We lose ourselves in the solitary greens amidst nature, thinking of the moments that we dream of spending together. Utopic?

Desires, desires, desires. They ruin it all.

They take us to a different world. ..Which might be suitable for writing poems, but if the whole world ran like this, ..each person lost in the dirty mazes of his own desires and utopia, who's going to step up and ask whether we need practical supports at the times of need? Who's going to care whether we are going at the right direction in our lives?

Romance serves well. But only as a topping. Without it, yes, the cake tastes bland. But sapping only cream, you end up getting impractically flabby.

The pain that you claim to get is because of your failure to taste those moments. But had you paid for that romance by caring about your love at the times when support was seeked? And are you sure that the support given then was not solely to taste those moments? Had you paid? And had you paid to buy? Sorry. Love is not sold. And do you Love? Did you love? ..just a few unnerving questions to avoid...

If everybody thought like this, the world would had come to a stand still, with every person dreaming inside his own cucoon of self-absorbment and holding impractical, colourful Desires, ..ever oblivient to the fact that they are never going to come true if they didn't venture out, breaking off that shell of self-absorbment. ..Just because, there's nobody waiting to love you outside. Because everybody happens to sleep like you, dreaming and dreaming and dreaming.

Hundreds of unfulfilled desires... enveloping this stupid world.
..And travelling round and round in circles without having any place left to go, ..always returning to its own genesis. And to top it all, sometimes there are double utopian ventures, when your love makes you believe that you are in love. ..Then it's just a question of who comes down to the brown of the soil first and breaks off this feeble relationship, that never was. And there are those couples who hold hands knowing that both of them dream, and asking each other to support their stupid dreams. And, may be, it's this love that stays.

I am going to tell you stories of a handful of real lovers, ..who loved their love more than they loved themselves. ..And how lucky had I been to meet them, face to face.

(to be continued...)

.

The twisted legacy
It turned around the learned brain

The anatomy of my soul
I split it open

Thousand pieces of glass entered me
It did not hurt

Sad but strange
I forgot what was pain

I fixed my eyes on you
Ravaging options came up

It was hard to concentrate
It was early morning

Dilemma of truth
I could not accept it
I could not kill you

Cold , true , moist were the textures in my eyes
Harsh,Disbelief tones were all you saw in those dark lanes.

Life , come to me once more
I will lead you another destination